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Embrace of the Vampire (1995)
Starring: Alyssa Milano, Martin Kemp, Harold Pruett
Writers: Halle Eaton, Nicole Coady, Rick Bitzelberger
Director: Anne Goursaud
Synopsis (From Anchor Bay):
Alyssa Milano stars as Charlotte, a
shy, sexually inexperienced college freshman stalked by a handsome
British vampire who believes her to be the reincarnation of his
long-dead lover. But with only three days to seduce the teen virgin,
he'll tempt Charlotte with forbidden passions that include sensual
dreams, a beautiful lesbian, torrid threesomes, scorching orgies and
beyond.
Review:
Any guy who was a teenager in the mid
nineties and had access to late night cable TV knows all about
Embrace of the Vampire, and I'd wager that most of them like it for
one particular reason. It was never a movie I set out to watch, but
if I was flipping through channels and nothing else was on BUT Embrace, I was
game for it every time. It seems like I always turned it on at the exact
right time, too, or one of the exact right times. Admittedly, the
story is rushed, light on explanation and pretty ridiculous, but all
that really means is there's no time wasted in getting to the steamy
stuff. Since sexual desire is what Embrace of the Vampire is largely
about, I can't call foul when it comes to the story.
You don't watch this movie to
appreciate how well the camera work is; you watch it for how sexy it
is. It's about five minutes into Embrace where you get your first
taste of how the film is going to play out. We're told a story of
lost love due to dire circumstance. A man watches his lady ride off
on a horse and he'll never see her again, for
that night he will be turned into a vampire by 3 gorgeous and
seductive creatures. And wow, what a scene... but this is just the
beginning.
How is Embrace of the Vampire in terms
of acting? I'm not sure that I'm supposed to care, but I know
for certain that I don't. If I had to pick, I'd say Jordan Ladd is
the best acting-wise, as Eliza, the “love to hate” character. But
the film is all about Alyssa Milano, as Charlotte. Moreover, it's
about how shocking it is seeing Milano being thrust into scenes you'd never have imagined seeing her in, if you grew up watching Who's the Boss? She's looks amazing; her hair, her lips, and every
curve of her body. Charlotte is a goody two-shoes type character, and
that makes the sexual theme even better. She slowly unravels and by
the final act she's showing adulteress-like qualities. But getting to that point is the main turn-on.
There's an onslaught of sexual situations. The photography scene is absolutely
stunning, where Sarah (Charlotte Lewis from The Golden Child) begins
snapping pictures of Charlotte in provocative poses, ultimately removing
her top and making out with her. From this
point on, Embrace of the Vampire is full-on intimacy. Charlotte
dreams of a graphic foursome, then unknowingly takes Ecstasy at a party and
witnesses everyone in the room completely going to town. There's
traditional sex, threesomes, girl-on-girl, guy-on-guy.... it's
fantastic. But out of nowhere in their own little section of the
room, there's that one trailer park couple who somehow accidentally
got invited to the party. The dude is pushing into his lady and
slamming a bottle of liquor, while she grinds on him and smokes a
cigarette. They're pretty out of place in a room full of hotness.
It's like mixing Showgirls with My Name Is Earl, but I assure
you, everything else is fulfilling.
Oh yeah, there is a boyfriend angle here. Chris (played by the late Harold Pruett, formerly Harrison
Pruett) is deeply in love with Charlotte, and has waited well over a
year to go all the way with her. Once the vampire (Martin Kemp)
begins pursuing Charlotte, Chris basically gets kicked to the curb.
There's also a good hint of homoeroticism involved with Mr. vampire
and the boyfriend, too. The night creature is an eloquent seducer, as
is shown in a bar scene where Chris meets Marika, played by Jennifer
Tilly. One of the funniest moments in the movie comes after this,
where Chris notices a tattoo on one of Marika's breasts and asks her
if it hurt, and she replies “Kind of. Why don't you kiss it and
make it feel better?” This scene doesn't get as physical as I'd
have liked it to, though. Shame about that.
Joseph Williams' film score is an
adequate mix of softcore porn and whisking adventure. It fits the
visuals of Embrace of the Vampire perfectly. And dudes, you're now at the age where you don't have to watch this movie on mute in your bedroom, so take a listen to the tunes.
Final Word:
I have a hard time calling Embrace of
the Vampire a horror film in any way. You don't seek out this
film looking to be scared or to have an insane amount of gore thrown
your way; you seek it out to see Alyssa Milano naked and involved in
erotic, nonchristian situations. The film gives you plenty of that.
If you've never seen it, prepare to be satisfied. If you haven't seen
it in a really long time, prepare to be satisfied again.
Blu-ray:
Embrace of the Vampire makes its
Blu-ray debut in an Unrated release from Anchor Bay
Entertainment. The film is presented 1080p Widescreen (1.85:1)
and has a Dolby TrueHD 5.1 Audio soundtrack. The Blu-ray contains no
special features. My boy Shawn from The Liberal Dead erased any
complaints about the lack of extras by saying “Alyssa Milano
completely nude is all the special features I need.”
It's pretty impossible to argue with
that logic, if you ask me.
The Blu-ray is available October 15th, 2013. Order HERE.
- Eric (Brobocop)
