Freddy's Nightmares
Season 1/Episode 4 - Freddy's Tricks and Treats
Starring: Robert Englund, Mariska Hargitay, Darren Dalton
Writers: Gilbert Adler, A L Katz, Wes Craven (Character)
Director: Ken Wiederhorn
When I was a kid, I was a huge fan of funny Freddy. The further sequels went, the more one liners Robert Englund spat out, the happier I was. Over time that changed. It's nearly impossible for me to make it through The Dream Child and Freddy's Dead now. The comedy shit really starts happening midway through Dream Warriors (sure, there's a few jokes in Freddy's Revenge, but for the most part that's a serious film); Dream Master is full of humor, but those two films still have a large amount of creativity that makes them pretty enjoyable. After that it just becomes too much. Once I got older and started to re-visit these films that I once watched more times than I care to admit to, I realized that funny Freddy really isn't all that funny. The one liners are fucking stupid. “Wanna suck face!?” Are you fucking kidding me? “What's with kids today, huh? No respect!” Yeah, because you became fucking lame, Krueger.
But anyway, yeah, back in the day I loved me some faux funny Freddy. And when news broke of a weekly TV series all about Freddy, my 11 year old ass was fucking elated, to say the least. Then I watched it. Yeah, I thought it left little to be desired, but I still kept turning it on every night --it aired right after SNL in my town, if I remember correctly. Some were better than others. Production value was pretty freakin' horrible, but whatever... it was fuckin' Freddy Krueger every fuckin' weekend and that's all that mattered to me at the time. You wanna see some great insight on this shit I highly recommend the Never Sleep Again Elm Street documentary, because they cover the fuck out of all things Freddy... everything you'd ever want to know.
Synopsis:
So, this story in particular, Freddy's Tricks and Treats... is a fuckin' mess. It starts out with this girl Marsha, a Michigan girl who has relocated to Springwood for medical studies. She has Granny issues she can't get over and is a bit perturbed at how hardcore other college kids are about celebrating the fuck out of Halloween. She thinks the day is no big deal and I hate the shit out of her already by default. Anyway, she starts hearing all the town legends of Freddy Kreuger and passes them off as campfire stories, then she starts seeing the bastard. Next thing you know (as soon as shit starts getting good), the story changes to these other two student dudes who are in fact studying Marsha's dreams because she is all messed up from some rotten past experience fuckery. In other words, the story just went down shit creek without a paddle. No more Halloween element (or any indication if it even really is Halloween), too much of Freddy and his wise cracking shenanigans and at this point I don't even know if Marsha was really a medical student to begin with. All I know is that she's fucked up because of some anti-sex Granny and that I can see her dreams on a monitor (much like viewing softcore porn back in the day on pay perview with the screen all scrambled because you didn't pay for it. My parents would have fucking killed me).
Rant:
This is one of the many episodes that Ken Wiederhorn (Return of the Living Dead II, Shock Waves) directed. I dunno, his expertise is pretty wasted here, as it just feels like the late night low budget horror show that it is. Freddy's Nightmares is basically a Balial twin brother to the Alfred Hitchcock Presents or the Tales From the Crypt series, if you ask me. It's not without entertainment, but you aint watching it to be mesmerized by cinematography (though, there is some nifty use of bright red and green lighting, a nod to Krueger's thrift store sweater), nor for great scripting or mind blowing performances. It was for Freddy. To be honest, the best episodes in the series were with Freddy in Crypt Keeper mode and not an actual part of the story (except for the Springwood slasher episode with the court case. That shit was pretty bad ass).
Acting is fucking horrendous, as are the characters being portrayed... except Granny! She's played by Elsa Raven (the old lady that ran around Hill Valley asking for money to save the clock tower in Back to the Future), and the lady is pretty damn good as a mean ole haggard bitch, disgruntled that she had the task of raising a grandchild instead of spoiling one like a Granny should. Mariska Hargitay is Marsha, the granddaughter medical student. She isn't given much by way of acting, mostly screaming and whining about getting straight A's. She has an undressing scene that my pervy ass is quite a fan of, as she has a cute bellybutton. Perhaps the best scenery in the entire episode. And Robert Englund is on point as always, whether I like the funny Freddy or not.
Kevin Yagher (Trick or Treat) does the Krueger makeup on the show, which means it's the same look as Elm Street 3 & 4. That's the best appearance of the character ever if you ask me, so that's a plus point. Not much of a gore element, save for a so-so autopsy. For "cool" props, we get a Skele-Freddy and a Jack O' Lantern with slash marks in it instead of a face. What a waste of a pumpkin.
As much as I think this show is pretty pitiful realistically, I can see myself watching the entire goddamned series with a heavy helping of Vodka. It's unintentionally funny, if anything, and usually I find unintentional humor more amazing than intentional humor. Happy Halloween!
